The Uninvited Guest
I have been having one of the longest weekends of my life. I claim its long, because it was shorter than I thought, yet it had a huge impact which could take a long time to subdue.
Okay everything started a year ago when I was invited to house party by a friend. You must be familiar with the house parties where you are invited by a friend, who had also been invited by another friend of the host of the party. In such parties, when you arrive there you literally find it hard fitting in. therefore when I arrived at the party, though I the welcome was quiet hospitable, I couldn’t get along with the guests there, most of whom comprised of young college kids.
I even had to stay for over an hour before I finally came to know what the party was all about. It was meant to celebrate life after college. The kids there spoke good and impeccable English unlike me, and I felt that I could be embarrassing myself when I realized that I didn’t understand most of the jargon used there. Therefore, my hopes of finding a good lady there seemed almost zero.
I decided to take myself back and continue sipping the whiskey which kept flowing. At least it was good whiskey. In fact, the guys there claimed that it had been brewed for 12 years and that left me wondering who the hell brews any alcohol for such long and still wants to make some money. Of course if you live in the ghetto like me, you are bound to such reasoning.
Anyhow, there was a young lady at the party who also seemed lonely like me and she wasn’t quiet interactive like the others. Most of her time, she was on her phone, probably tweeting, and this made me think that she would be suffering the same communication ‘breakdowns’ like I was doing. There was something which was pushing me to go and chat her up, but again the thought that she may outweigh me in communication made me to stay in my own world.
However, as the supply of the whiskey increased, and so was my state of inebriation, I decided to approach her. Funny enough, she was different and we easily communicated… or maybe the alcohol in me made me believe that. There was a lot that I told her, but in the morning I couldn’t remember shit.
Seizing an Opportunity when it is Due
There was one thing though that I remembered, she had told me that her boyfriend was working in Europe. This meant an opportunity for me. There one thing that I usually know; if you meet a lady who is dating someone who lives in another country and they are not married, always keep her close. Chances are that their relationship will never work. Actually it seldom works.
I therefore I knew that this was an opportunity for me and the first step as usual is to radicalize such a lady. The most common advice of radicalizing such a lady is to make her believe that there is no way that a man can live for a year without sex… he must he getting it from whenever he is. This applies to cases where boyfriends stay over years without heading back home especially when they are studying.
If you repeatedly sound the alarm to such a lady, it later turns to be a facts and she will believe you. And since I had the number of the lady from the previous night that is what I exactly did. For the next week we would chat and talk and I would try to ‘radicalize’ her. She actually bought the story and soon, I was banging the ‘goodies’. The good thing is that, I wasn’t paying shit for all this. The guy was sending money for us to go for diner and such places.
Now this couple had their own issue. The girl wanted the guy to marry her the next time he visited, and probably have a kid or two, but the guy was hesitant. This also played to my advantage. However, things took a different shift a couple of months ago when the two decided to break up. Now the girl shifted attention to me.
She had used to tell me about the arguments that they were having, but after the break up, the first thing that she asked me when we met was what I was waiting for instead of considering marriage. That sounded an alarm. I could sense real danger here. I didn’t want to ruin my supply of ‘goodies’ and so I told her that I wasn’t yet ready for marriage.
After about two weeks, I started seeing her updates on social media. Some went like
‘Why do we waste time looking so far when happiness is surrounding you?’
‘I think I’m in love again!’
There were other suggestive updates which made me believe that something was in the offing. And the unexpected unveiled itself last weekend which was the longest and shortest weekend that I have experienced of late. The lady came to visit me.
When an Opportunity Turns Sour
For the first time, she prepared food for me which was very delicious and appetizing that I started wondering where she had not been cooking for me whenever she visited me previously. The following day, I had a meeting and we were supposed to leave together in the morning. When I woke up, I was surprised by another bounty of delicious healthy breakfast. After a shower, she told me that she was quiet sleepy and instead of living in the morning, she would go home in the afternoon after I arrived back.
I arrived later in the afternoon and on opening the door, I first through that I had confused my own house. The seats had been dusted and rearranged neatly. The walls which had missed water for a very very long time had been thoroughly scrubbed, and some food was awaiting me, nicely arranged at the table. We had late lunch together and then went to take a nap. From the look of things, she wasn’t going home that day either. I also could not get the guts to tell her to leave. We spent the night together.
Sunday morning, she ensured that she did all the laundry in the house thoroughly and ensured that everything was clean before leaving in the evening. The girl must have been taught real tricks of hunting men. Now I still don’t know what to do. It is a clear indication that sometimes we men marry without second thoughts.